she and I

I’m made up of every me
 that
I have ever been

including the one who once thought
she loved you

I hold her memories
I hold her heart
I know her sorrow, her unfiltered pain
I know the why behind every single choice
she ever made

and I see her foolishness

her stubborn trust

how she looked at you

the way she pictured us
and I can still feel
through the thrum of her heart
what it used to be like
to need you

we were once one
but we aren’t the same
so don’t be a fool and mistake my strength
for weakness

Advertisements

this is strength

It’s golden, this haven
I wrap it around me
it glows as it settles
it fits like it knew

the shape of your arrows
so sharp and narrow
I don’t recognize them
I poise to fight them
but this gleaming solace
will not let me go

it won’t let me send them back like I want to
(in moments of weakness I’m just like you)
it won’t send them flying back
won’t let them breed
it won’t let them pierce holes of you into me
instead it just shines, so bright that I’m blinded
and they disappear
the hate unrequited
the pain that it brings goes unfelt by me
in my golden peace
I no longer see

your poison arrows
your blackened bow
raised with intention
your precious weapon
all that you know

I pity the thoughts inside your head
that see only darkness.