oh retrospect, yes, please, do come in

cold on the shore

dripping and shaking

salt in my hair and my eyes and my lungs

that was the sea

for a moment I’d swum

and you wanna know what?

it was nothing like you

nothing like floundering, drowning and blue

in a puddle.

expect overtime

showdown #563:

what you know to be true
vs.
what you’ve convinced yourself of

stuck is a choice

forcing it to work

then coming to realize

it doesn’t have to

almost-but-not love

the trouble with it

was that I was mourning you

before you were gone

you knew too

I hold you in my hands
  (but something about the shape)
I hold with all my might
  (it doesn’t fit, it isn’t right)

Mine because I hold
Want because I have
I try to raise you up but the weight
it’s not enough and far too much
  (but mine, but want)

I hold you in my hands
but they know
and they can’t.

“It wasn’t a waste,” said love. 

“It’s only love,” said time.

too easy

it was so easy

whispering all my secrets

to you as you slept

you said you need time to think

but to think
that I raced up a mountain
without a single thought
just to reach you
makes me wonder
as I’m reaching for you now
what kind of mountain keeps you
from racing to me

the air I need to breathe

if you knew how much

of it you took when you left

would you still be gone?

uncertainty

he tightens the clamp

that squeezes my swollen heart

but you put it there

and drown

in between these bouts

I rinse my face; so much salt

I could swim in it

I can’t help it

I’m thinking about

all the bad things we could do

to hurt each other

so I won’t

always knowing and

naming what it is you feel

spoils all the fun

what countdown?

it doesn’t matter

we might have missed midnight but

we made up for it

I just realized

that there hasn’t been

a day since we met that I 

haven’t heard your voice

this may be premature

but I’m thinking that

loving you is a distinct

possibility

still haven’t slept

don’t want to jinx it

but I feel like this just might 

become something good